They shopped, they conquered


See...even here they're trying not to snicker at us

So…our daughters like to make fun of us when we don’t know how to do things they consider common knowledge. This became all too obvious recently while shopping with one of them. We approached the checkout lanes, all of which had lines basically as long as the water ride at Cedar Point on a 90-degree day. Except for the self-checkout lanes. They were empty.

Here’s how the conversation went:

“Mom, let’s go through the self-check lane.”
“Ummmm….I don’t know how to do that.”
“Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat?????? C’mon. You’re kidding, right? It’s SO easy.”
“Fine. You do it. I’ll watch.”
Big eyeroll and bigger sigh.
Ultimately, she did the deed and explained it to me. Part of the explanation stuck with me.

Several months later, we (the husband and me), two measly items in hand, approached the checkout lanes once again. All were full — of course. It never fails. After standing in line for 10 minutes, I suggested we try the self-check lanes. Here’s how that conversation went:

Me: Let’s try the self-check lanes.
Him: Uh…are you sure? I don’t know how. Do you?
Me: (Lying) Sure.
Him: Okay. What happens if we screw up?
Me: They put you in jail. You’re the guy.

So off we went to the self-checkout lanes, where a very stern young woman stood guard from her post, making sure no one cheated. Okay, really she was there to help out when the newbies got stuck. As it turned out, my first attempt was successful, much to the husband’s surprise. We were out of the store before our previous line had moved more than two inches forward. WE were smiling….THEY weren’t.

Feeling foolishly, goofily proud of ourselves, we headed off to find our car. Which, by the way, is never a simple matter. Now if someone can just explain to us how to locate our car without walking up and down every aisle, our shopping trips will be much more efficient. Just don’t tell our daughters. It’ll just give them more fuel for laughter.

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